Food diary 3

1. whole wheat bagel with laughing cow cheese

2. chai tea with sugar and milk

3. sesame beef with rice noodle

5. blueberries

5. 1 whole wheat pita with hummus dip

6. chocolate soy milk

7. bowl of spaghetti with meat sauce

...then body pump class!

Food diary 2

1. oatmeal with blueberries and brown sugar

2. english muffin with fried egg and ham

3. coffee

4. pasta with meat sauce

5. some rice crisps

6. 2 mini carrot muffins

7. soy chocolate milk

...didn't feel like eating a real dinner

Food Diary

1. oatmeal with blueberries and brown sugar

2. english muffin with blackforest ham and mustard

3. chocolate chip cookies (6)

4. spinach salad with ceasar dressing and blueberries

5. strawberry yogourt

6. two mini carrot muffins

7. spaghetti with meat sauce, mushrooms

8. one cup of soy chocolate millk

...how many calories is that?

coming back full circle

I was reading through my old journal and I found this:

I didn't know why I was going to cry, but I knew that if anybody spoke to me or looked at me too closely the tears would fly out of my eyes and the sobs would fly out of my throat and I'd cry for a week. I could feel the tears brimming and sloshing in me like water in a glass that is unsteady and too full. ~Sylvia Plath,The Bell Jar

"It is a positive and active anguish"-WJ

Update!
I did get a haircut after all. I gathered my courage and opted for the straight cut bangs, but it's pretty much all grown out now. It was also difficult to maintain and made me look very young. It is almost due time for another haircut, but I don't know what to do this time. Maybe I will save it until December.

I've been reading constantly on depression and I've learned so many new things about it that I've never even heard of before. This is surprising to me since I've been studying psychology for 5 years and yet it still has new and exciting things to teach me. I guess grad school is kinda great in that respect.

I've realized that there has been a paradigm shift in research on the neurobiology of depression. I really didn't prescribe to the whole "chemical imbalance" theories and the idea of treating people with a happy pill. Turns out it's much more complicated than that :P

"I kinda have a shoe addiction" "you DO have a shoe addiction"

Some girls love bags. Some love clothes. I love shoes.
Although I do love clothes and bags, I would rather splurge on shoes than anything else. Even though I have feet troubles and they always hurt me...I still love them >< I need to find knockoffs of these chloes >< and these!

Steve Madden Oxfords
But I actually need flats! I've wanted these Marc Jacob mouse flats for forever! The only time I've seen it on sale they didn't have my size T_T
Should I just get them or keep searching for the perfect flat?

I need a haircut

I've been trying to grow my hair long for about a year now. Then I got tired of my side part, especially because I was also growing out my bangs and they got really thick and I didn't know what to do with them. Now I'm tired of my middle part, it kinda makes my face look really long and my forehead really big. So...maybe I'm meant to have bangs! lol
#1. angled bangs

I get to retain my length but I will probably have to invest in a straightening iron because my hair is too wavy :(

#2. Long bangs

These will probably be way too high maintainance but they're soo cute o_o I don't think they'll work, though, because my bangs usually don't grow straight down :(

#3. Side bangs

These bangs look cute but maybe too thick?

#4. Short side bangs with short hair

I've had these for a long time, but I don't think I can part with my length after waiting so long for it to grow!

Ideally, I would want my hair to look like Jane Birkin's...so straight and bangs fall so nicely straight down and looks so effortless o_o sigh....

I think that's a good length to maintain tho :)

I also think that Daria Werbowy looks like a modern Jane Birkin